Chronicles

Depression isn't enough.

2012-01-27T10:33:00.005+08:00

I want to disappear.

SUCKS TO BE SICKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK. I HATE IT.
But I don't feel sick today.
Just don't really feel like going to school.
I need to go get another MC though damnit.

I can't wait until NS is over.
Then I can go somewhere else for University.
And escape from everything.
Really really don't like going to school nowadays.

Problems

2012-01-22T21:32:00.001+08:00

Please come back online.
I'm really really sorry!
I should be the one starting conversations.
Not you. I'm sorry.

YOU BETTER BE BUSY!
OR SLEEPING!
OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT!

I hate it when my parents fight.
It's like I have to take a stand or else I die twice.
I want to lock myself in my room or something.

Dreams...

2012-01-21T21:47:00.008+08:00

...are so funny. One conversation is all I need. One love is all I need. One dream is all I need.

I wanna apologize. But is it worth it to bring back all the awkwardness? I don't think so. And hope is a nice thing. WHY CAN YOU MAKE ME SO NOT DEPRESSED I FIND YOU SO ANNOYING. WHY AM I MORE INTERESTING TO TALK TO THAN YOUR RELATIVES IN YOUR HOUSE WTF DO YOU KNOW HOW WEIRD YOU ARE but I like it haha.

AND TO THINK TODAY I WWAS WORRYING IF YOU WERE STIlL MAD. LOOOOOOOL. i still apologized.............I MISS YOU.

IM SO SICK.
QUOTE WANG AI LING,
"In love, we never question ourselves whether it's worth it."

I realized something.
Everytime you have ever been online, we have talked.
Does that count for anything?

R.I.P Pinehas.
I wished I could say more...but I didn't know you well...and I'm sorry for that.
(I'm not a dick for putting this below the rest of my post...it's just that i got the news after writing the stuff above it).

2012-01-20T21:30:00.003+08:00

I never wanted to screw things up so badly. I'm so sorry.
I didn't think of the consequences, I didn't think of you first.
Being selfish came so naturally. I'm scared.
Am I ruining our friendship?

Why do I need you so badly?
I can't stand myself.
I wish you could read me, you could understand me.
Suddenly I wish you were reading this.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? YOU OWE ME NOTHING.
BUT I OWE YOU SO MUCH. TOO MUCH.
Depression spreads. I hate myself.
I imagine bonds as ropes. They're snapping.
I don't wanna fall.

I can't even make contact with you anymore.
You find it weird talking to me in person,
and you worry about your stupid fucking phone bill
(which isn't much of an issue since you take ages to reply nowadays)
AND you are almost never online.

"If it's just for fun, then not everyday".
I definitely don't talk to you everyday.
If I did, would I still be breaking?

I don't wanna take Chem O anymore.
I don't wanna take physics O anymore.
I don't wanna be me.

HOME

2012-01-17T21:55:00.002+08:00

Haha today was pretty nice. Chemistry is so awesome!
Mr. Lee loves me and doesn't scold me when I play on ben's phone.
In front of him. Even when he sees. Haha and then he scolds people for eating.
STUPID DONG LUH. MAKE ME READ TEXTBOOK. Andy the dungslayer hahhahahhahahah.

I'm going to fail at chemistry O.
I'm not even studying hahha.
Even brandon is like studying. On the MRT.
There's Biomedical training tomorrow
But I have encouragement from Jack.
And that's all I need haha.

Oh yeah, bout jack...
I AM LOSING MY RESOLVE AND FAILING.

It feels nice that patterns don't change.
BUT WHEN I TALK ABOUT HOMEWORK
I DONT WANT YOU TO TALK ABOUT HOMEWORK.
I WANT YOU TO TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE.

Going home with him was weird.
I was ignoring him at first,
even after we were alone at paya lebar.

Then he did something.
And I did something.
Then we started talking.

...
IM SORRY I EVER IGNORED YOU TODAY.

zero

2012-01-13T22:12:00.002+08:00

WOW JACK TOTALLY NOT PISSED OFF AT YOU AT ALL.

I HAVE NEVER EVER BEEN THIS ANGRY WITH YOU.
GO SCREW YOURSELF. ON A STAKE. GO SUICIDE OR SOMETHING
GO TO HELL.

NOW YOU KNOW WHAT DEPRESSED FEELS LIKE.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT.

From today onwards, i'm going to try my best to forget you.

2012-01-11T20:10:00.003+08:00

I HATE IT WHEN WE MAKE EYE CONTACT FROM ACROSS THE ROOM. SO AWKWARD.

*mustgetfitlikehimwtfhaha*

Today we had ACE!
It's like all of the serious people are voting for me
and everyone else for Dong Jun and Peifang.

Does it suck that I sort of wanted to be mentor rep?
Just to see how a leaderhsip role would feel like.

Oh well, I got secretary for Art Club instead
so yeah I guess that it's fine (mostly).

Now that something's happened
I feel like all the stars are shining, just for me. no us. them? whatever.
I'll do my suibi another day.

I think I might hate tomorrow.
Because I looked at the timetables and I was happy
that I can go home with Jack on thursday!
But I might not.

(he might not) ---> (I will be very sad).

I don't knowwww.
I want someone to tell me that they know
and that they will tell me what to do
so maybe I can talk to them about it.

I wanna ask Jack out.

2012-01-10T23:20:00.002+08:00

AM I ANNOYING
AM I BEING ANNOYING BY ASKING IF IM ANNOYING
I COULD REALLY BREAK DOWN RIGHT NOW.

If i was in this mood this morning,
and i saw him,
i think i would have snapped.

Messages.

2012-01-10T19:50:00.003+08:00

1. Think for 1 hour on what to write in order to not sound like a stalker
2. Think for 1 hour on whether to actually send the message
3. Send it
4. Panic for the next 1 hour.

IF REPLY IS RECEIVED:
1. Be F*cking happy!
2. Start conversation as per normal
3. Stop conversation
4. Go to sleep feeling awesome.

IF REPLY IS NOT RECEIVED:
1. Get sad due to sense of perceived loneliness and abandonment
2. Try to rationalize the reason I don't get a reply.
3. Still feel sad.
5. Go to sleep feeling unloved
5. Calm down the next day after actually seeing the person.

RINSE AND REPEAT.

Sadness

2012-01-09T21:19:00.007+08:00

It sucks when you promise me something and you don't do it.
Even though I had no right to your promise, it still hurts.
Am I being selfish?

I am really really dreamy and off right now,
like my head is like detached from my shoulders or something.

Maaan, I knew you'd forget me.
But I don't wanna tell you.
You already feel bad for me.
I'm going to go sleep a little sadder than when I woke up.
As long as it's only one of us that's sad.

And you know something?
If you care about your phone bill more than your girlfriend,
maybe you need to think about your priorities.

OH DEAR WHAT IF I MADE YOU FEEL BAD
/you are going to kill me tomorrow.

Questions

2012-01-08T13:53:00.004+08:00

I'm happy that old, simple, insecurities are coming back.

Where to have lunch?
Should I get this pen?
Should I sms Jack now?

It's raining and I want my lunch!
I'm too lazy to go and find my umbrella. In my messy drawer.

Jack, you should NOT open a message if you're too busy to reply damnit.
You just end up making me feel nervous and highstrung.

But it's okay.
Now that I know, I can like talk to you anytime I want.
And you say you don't mind. I think you do, but it's ok.

Everything is okay.
Not perfect, but okay.

Life is all about priorities.

1. I dunno
2. I dunno
3. I dunno

I don't know what I want.
I don't think I want anything.
I don't expect anything from life anymore.
Anything can make me happy.
Life is so simple that way.

Won't Give Up

2012-01-07T23:18:00.007+08:00

I won't be angry over facebook.
I won't be angry over being ignored.
I won't be angry over not being _____ .
I won't be angry with you.
I'm sorry for all the times I was angry with you.

Sad, yes that's fine. angry, no more.
Love is too precious for that.

You know what I think the best moment is?
When you're tired but still talking to that Someone ♥

So gay haha.

2012-01-03T23:17:00.005+08:00

YOU are HIGH.
Is it normal to agonize over sending something?
I think I wont sms Jack anything until after orientation.
I know how to talk to Jack to be okay with him again.

RANDOM CRAP I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN GOOD AT WRITING.
HEY NOT LIKE ANYTHING CHANGED BETWEEN US.
SO WHY DID I CHANGE?

THIRD PLACE ISNT BAD! haha.

I'm hungry. I'm only hungry when I feel okay.

I feel full when I'm depressed.
It's a good mood indicator.

I feel damn weird in Faraday now.
It's like Benedix and Jiaying and ze xuan are all not there,
so i can only talk to yaazhini.

(Talking to...popular people(?) is weird because moneem isnt there)
(At least got Kelvin. But Kelvin sleeps during house meeting zzzz)

And my dance partner is gabriel.
Who is even more confused over the steps than me haha.

Eh but mass dance is just to boost school spirit lah.
All you unenthu people at the back!
At least I can be forced to be enthusiastic!

But I can't really understand whats going on during dance.

2012-01-02T18:34:00.004+08:00

What if a year was shorter: 200 days
What if a year was longer: 500 days

What if a day was shorter: 15 hours
What if a day was longer: 40 hours

And so on. I wish a year was longer.
And I wish days were longer.

I wish I was patient.
I wish I could be fine.
I wish I was faithful.
I wish I was kind.

I wish I was everything.

I am a fool.

It is really hard to keep resolutions.
I am very very close to failing.

Happy 2012

2012-01-01T15:56:00.003+08:00

Life is bullshit that I will never understand.

2012 is here.
Resolutions:

Be a better person

Not get angry at Jack (I will do it!)

Get Fit (working on it)

Good Results????????????

Number 4 is pretty stupid I think.

It feels nice when you know that
someone you like cares about you,
even if it's just a little.

It feels nice to be missing someone now.

2011-12-31T00:25:00.006+08:00

DAY I STAY AWAKE UNTIL FOUR IN THE MORNING: doesnt go online.
DAY MY INTERNET CRASHES ON ME IN THE AFTERNOON: goes online at 8pm.

fuck
you
jack

,

fuck
you
internet

,

and
fuck
you
___.

2011-12-26T22:50:00.004+08:00

CRIMINAL MINDS:

1. someone dies at the start.
2. someone dies in the middle.
3. someone is held hostage at the end, and survives.

BLEEEEEEH so tired of this format,
after watching like i dunno 20 episodes.

How to just be happy? ohhh deeeaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrr.
I can never follow advice I give.

2011-12-25T17:21:00.004+08:00

It's been a really really really really really.

sad christmas.
CHRISTMAS ALONE.
not really alone,
dad is the couch sleeping,
but still alone.

Uncle Colin was cremated today.

Going to visit 4th uncle at hospital later.

I feel really really miserable.
Depression comes and goes,
but missing someone just gets worse everyday.

I wake up thinking that "today is the day I miss Jack the most"
and it gets more. just...more.
So much that I might actually get angry.
Sorry, I am already angry zzzzz.

How can I ever, Try to be better

2011-12-22T10:02:00.007+08:00

My dreams are becoming more realistic. I don't get imagination anymore.
I feel too normal. ALL YOUR FAULT PEOPLE FROM SCHOOL!
I had a black and white dream last night. About goddamn FACEBOOK.

I'm saaaaaaaaaadddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd.
very sad ):
WHERE IS JACK?
At the airport :\

WHY CANT HE BE ONLINE?
He's busy :\

9gag and tumblr makes me happy when I feel alone...
It doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone,
but I sort of can't wait for school to start.

I don't want to see orientation,
I don't want to see February.

Somehow, somewhere, someday,
there'll be someone.

Pails

2011-12-20T23:33:00.003+08:00

I miss you.

Why do we keep trying to make precious memories and push forward, when we can't?
I wish I was greedier, more selfish sometimes. I think would be happier. But you wouldn't.
I wish I had infinte time, or infinite moments with you.

I don't enjoy spending time with you or talking to you,
because I know it's going to end and it'll be over and I'll be broken again.

I wish I could appreciate memories with you.
But as I list them down, they suddenly become unreal.
Memories live in my mind as pictures, emotions, not words.

I need an escape. I need time to stop. I want to live.
I've tried so hard to come in and I still stand on the outside.

2011-12-19T19:38:00.001+08:00

An evil "troll," (actually the devil himself),makes a magic mirror that has the power to distort the appearance of things reflected in it. It fails to reflect all the good and beautiful aspects of people and things while it magnifies all the bad and ugly aspects so that they look even worse than they really are. The devil teaches a "devil school," and the devil and his pupils delight in taking the mirror throughout the world to distort everyone and everything. They enjoy how the mirror makes the loveliest landscapes look like "boiled spinach." They then want to carry the mirror into heaven with the idea of making fools of the angels and God, but the higher they lift it, the more the mirror grins and shakes with delight. It shakes so much that it slips from their grasp and falls back to earth where it shatters into billions of pieces — some no larger than a grain of sand. These splinters are blown around and get into people's hearts and eyes, making their hearts frozen like blocks of ice and their eyes like the troll-mirror itself, only seeing the bad and ugly in people and things.

I know this shouldn't be a lonely time

2011-12-19T01:54:00.004+08:00

I have my 207 class jacket! It's zipless I dunno how Im gonna wear it.
It feels really comfy and soft I think I'll sleep with it haha.
I miss Manish and yantong! So retarded.
Funny how I don't miss Shi Yi.

I pretty much miss all the other regular people though.

It hurts when I had to be the one taking the high road, and pretend I didn't care.
But it turns out to be worth it in the end when I see the smiles.
Sometimes, all I need is a little reassurance.

But sometimes, I wonder if I'm the problem, if I'm the one that shouldn't exist.
1 week is a long long time. I hope Jack's okay.

It goes to show how much my character/personality sucks when
I wondered why wasnt Jack was online because I was so alone,
instead of thinking "what if something happened to him?"

Please please let him be alright.

Do opposites attract? Because all our similarities are opposites.

Holidays

2011-12-17T23:21:00.004+08:00

I am really empty.
I don't want to sleep tonight.
I want to wait.

Watching criminal minds taught me I can't let life take me down.
I need to work harder, I need to live. I can do it.
I'm not going to give up hopes and dreams because of words that aren't my own.

It also taught me to treasure what I have.
Sure, I might not be a partner, but I can be a friend.
That's all they've ever asked of me.
I've got 2 arms and 2 legs, I've got life ahead of me.
I don't want to miss it.

(I want you to be there though, no matter how impossible.)

"Whatever you're doing, be a good one."
-Abraham Lincoln

Oh and being mopey and depressed SUCKS!

2011-12-15T22:07:00.002+08:00

OH SCREW THIS
WRITING ALL THESE POSTS ARE USELESS!

I shall go do valentine's day stuff
I've been putting off for weeks.

I MISS YOU A LOT.
BUT I DON'T NEED YOU.
We all want what we don't need.

And now I can't ask you to come online anymore.

Respsonses

2011-12-15T19:53:00.004+08:00

Tears signify self-pity.
At least, that's what my dad told me.
Every teardrop is a waterfall.
Every tear holds broken promises, unfulfilled wishes, lost dreams.
I'm scared when I cry about someone.
It feels like I'm losing a part of myself,
a part of my love or like for that person.

Does crying make you weak?

I have never been so happy as to cry.
I don't think I know what being happy even feels like.
Laughter, smiles don't necessarily mean someone's happy.
It just means they're amused.

And depending, it's not nice to love a person.
Or is it like? I don't know what I'm feeling.
That person told me 6 months meant love.

Love + Like.
I see Live.

Anyway, sometimes it sucks, sometimes its good.
It sucks when they're away, but its the most fantastic feeling
to be at least communicating with that person and/or
knowing that that person feels the same way.

I don't know anything about it actually.
But the truth is, I feel terrible most of the time.

I have no purpose. I was born because my dad and mom had sex.
The world would be a better place if I didn't exist.
Mainly because I would only be alright if Jack didn't exist.

Just saying, hopefully I pissed him off enough.

Hoping that who you like finds happiness is such a unselfish move.
I want to do it, I think I can do it, but I want myself to be ok too.
Am I selfish and greedy? I could be. I should be.
But I don't want to be. Nothing happened today actually.
I don't know why everything happens.

Why
Why
Why

Getting Ready

2011-12-13T20:04:00.004+08:00

As the Earth revolves around the Sun,
The moon revolves around the Earth.

But the Sun will grow bigger,
essentially the Earth gets closer and closer to the sun.
But the Moon is slowly drifting away.
The Earth cant touch the sun, everything will die.
The Moon cant touch the earth, probably (only) millions will die.

The effect I've had is minimal.
The sun's pull is always stronger.

No moon.
Tides are less extreme,
the sky will no longer be as bright most of the time,
all we see are stars.

I have nothing less to lose.
I have everything to lose.

Getting ready for depression, it's like a wave.
It rises, it falls, but it always comes back.
It's the most extreme when the sun and moon are in opposite directions.
That means tides are most extreme during lunar eclipses?

I'm thinking too much.
Pizza, boobs, Ice-cream, Art.

You know, its funny.
He said it was impossible right now.
But look at the quote at the top.
I guess it means it will forever be impossible.

2011-12-10T19:37:00.001+08:00

So I told Jack how I felt.
And we're still friends. So I guess its ok.

2011-12-10T15:01:00.001+08:00

You matter too much.

2011-12-09T12:22:00.002+08:00

Suddenly I've become so selfish.

People, lives, everything becomes so meaningless.

Cleverbot: How are you?
Me: Really sad.
Cleverbot: Why?
Me: I love someone who doesn't love me
Cleverbot: How is that bad?

...ARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGH.
Cleverbot sounds like Jack though haha.

2011-12-09T12:22:00.000+08:00

Suddenly I've become so selfish.

People, lives, everything becomes so meaningless.

Songbird

2011-12-09T11:33:00.003+08:00

For you, there'll be no more crying,
for you, the sun will be shining,
And I feel that when I'm with you,
It's alright, I know it's right.

To you, I'll give the world
To you, I'll never be cold
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,
It's aright, I know it's right.

And the songbirds are singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you
Like never before.

And I wish you all the love in the world,
But most of all, I wish from myself.

And the songbirds are singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you
Like never before.

Falling Fast. Falling deep.

Books

2011-12-06T22:34:00.003+08:00

I used to think that relationships written in books were stupid and fake,
like "my heart jumped when I saw her message".

yeah now I realize that's what actually happens.

I LOVE YOU! lol nothing has changed. THATS AWESOOOOOOOOMMMMMEEEEEEEE!

Normal Post

2011-12-06T21:13:00.004+08:00

(Paintball hurts!) 207 Paintball session was damn fun!
I suck at it (and so I'm going to fail at army) but it was fun!
Like playing some real tactical FPS,
we had to run and hide at barricades and spam paint shots.

It was:

Me
Shi Yi
Yantong
Masaki (NCC)
Benedix

VERSUS

Manish (NCC)
Sam (NCC)
Ze Xuan (FPS)
Matthew (FPS)
Jacelyn (Barbaric woman)

SO YEAH WE LOST the first 2 matches
until the instructor switched masak out and switched him in.
When he switched masaki out my team was like,
Shiiiit, gonna lose even more stupidly.
But then he said he was going to join our team,

...

And we totally OWNED the other team.
I shot 2 people! not sure where or who but I scored YEAH!

A paintball hit the side of my face and I got paint all over the side of my face.
Another 2 hit my lower arm and lower leg,
and I have a really ugly bleeding bruise there.
It makes me look macho I think. Battle scars!
Nah just kidding.

And it's true, paintball hurts like...uh...it hurts. really really bad.
Sorry for my stupid english I haven't really been caring about languages.
I mean, where the ball hit my lower arm,
there is like a half circle of small cuts in my arm.
and it's really sore.

My shoes got really dirty, because the place is seriously muddy
(it's like the school field, the kind of mud where you sink in and get stuck).
I got into deep trouble when I washed it because all the mud,
it clogged up the backyard drain, and I made the backyard dirty.

Yeah I don't give a crap about the backyard.

Go online! I cant contact you.
But I talked to you already so it's okay I guess mmmmm.
You should've come today! You lazy idiot! haha.

2011-12-04T22:11:00.000+08:00

Maybe i'm annoying.
Yeah that's' it.

2011-12-03T22:27:00.001+08:00

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_degrees_of_separation

You're going to leave without saying anything again,
and I will feel like a piece of shit.

2011-12-03T11:50:00.003+08:00

It's like, i keep sinking and sinking.
And one little thing, one event pulls me all the way up.
I expect more of it, but then it doesn't happen.
I start sinking back down again, and the cycle repeats.

Realism

2011-12-02T20:34:00.004+08:00

What's going to happen?

I want an ordinary day, with an ordinary person.
I shouldn't guess, nothing's going to happen.
It was just an ordinary dream.

No matter what is going to happen, I will be just...tired.
I'm tired of this. Tired of everything.
I shall go read FML to make myself better.

I

2011-12-01T23:11:00.008+08:00

That really terrible moment when:

the person you like asks for relationship advice with their current partner.

Acting is hard. What are you supposed to say?
Trusting me is the worst thing anyone could ever do.

I found a good song from White Chicks! Can't believe it.
Bigass grasshopper in my room. Accidentally touched it thinking it was my phone.
Freaked out when my phone crawled up my arm lmao.
I turned on the lights and it flew out into the landing
after seeing my ugly face ):

Even insects don't like me.
Today is the best and the worst day in my life.
I will never get angry at Jack again!
Because being mad at Jack makes me feel really lousy about myself.

2011-12-01T11:54:00.000+08:00

Jack fell asleep with phone in hand no wonder.

X

2011-11-30T20:47:00.002+08:00

Should I
Should I
Should I

I shouldn't
I shouldn't
I shouldn't

Dawn and xingjing will tell me I should.

I should!!!!
But I get so pissed when the reply takes more than 30 minutes.
Because usually it takes like 10 seconds.
That's why X is annoying.

Disease

2011-11-30T20:37:00.003+08:00

My feet and hands have a fungus.
Basically, it eats my skin until I bleed.
I've had medication for this since primary school,
not that it worked because i refused to take it.

Mainly because I had self-image issues (I still do)
and I didn't want to acknowledge that I had a disease.
It didn't help when my friend told me my hand was going to fall off.
The "a" key on my keyboard isnt working damnit.

I had to apply cream on my feet and hands every night,
and wear gloves because the cream was toxic.
(to prevent the cream from reaching other parts of my body).
I also had to stop eating sour cream and onion potato chips,
because apparently that's what causes my...condition to flare up.

My feet stank, because of the dead skin
kept in closed shoes (school!) and socks.
(My dad used to scold me for this)
I couldnt touch detergent or soap either,
and I had to wash my socks by hand, 3 times a week.
I hated it/I still hate it.
Oh and it sort of makes my skin kind of sensitive,
so sometimes it hurts(?) a bit when I hold stuff.

Posting so much today because I have a lot to think about
because I'm pretty much stuck at home until 9pm.

2011-11-30T17:31:00.004+08:00

I hate myself for making the world a sadder place.
One sad person makes 10 happy people sad.
But 10 happy people can only make 1 sad person happy.

I find it hard to experience distinct emotion.
It just feels....negative. A minus.
It just doesn't feel good. Like a tumour.
I have to tell myself that everyday is normal,
the world is normal, things you want to change will never change,
and things you want to stay unchanging will change.

The world is terrible to me.
Because I don't like it in the first place.
Maybe its a cycle or karma or whatever it is.

Sadness = absence of Happiness.
Sadness isnt negative happiness.
So two sad people will never be happy.
Sadness is a virus. It's contagious.
If psychological illnesses can be cured,
why can't sadness? Sadness is a psychological state,
you should be able to get rid of it.
I wish we could be immune,
or there could be a cure or a vaccine.

All of you people asking "how's life?"
I really want to say "it fucking sucks!"
but I don't because I'm a coward.
I don't want to tell other people how I feel.
Because 1 sad person can make 10 happy people sad.

Except X.
X is never sad which is annoying.
Or maybe X has been before, but Ive never seen it.
Just goes to show how much
I actually care to know about others.
X just gets angry ---> quiet.
X has distinct emotions.

Unlike me.
Hmmm its easier to cure something
when it's one huge lump of poison to cut out.

When people feel cold before die,
is it something emotional?
Science explains it too well.
Science explains everything too well.
I'd rather live in ignorance and have my "what ifs"
than have science prove everything true or false for me.

Why am I even in this school?
Should have gone to a neighbourhood one.

2011-11-30T09:47:00.002+08:00

A wasp was drowning in a pool on my balcony.
So I saved it.
It just got eaten by a bird.

Dots

2011-11-28T16:45:00.006+08:00

My views will no longer be influenced by others.

I AM AWKWARD. never mind all great people are.

Everytime i see something on tumblr that is like: "I wish my friends' houses were connected to mine via secret tunnels" I cancel out "friend" and add someone else's name.

It's code! The black flagholders were actually red crayon,
just that I autotoned it with photoshop (for fun) and it turned black (uh.....)
Tumblr is lagging on me so its here instead.

2011-11-27T22:56:00.003+08:00

X, you talk retardedly! It's funny lmao haha
I TALK RETADEDLY BECAUSE OF YOU! never mind i dun mind

this might be the best day of the week ive had so far :)

2011-11-27T21:39:00.003+08:00

I've thrown my phone into my drawer because i dont want to see it. Moved back home today. Suddenly everything seems...not as bright anymore.

When I went out on the balcony I saw something damn cool. It was like 3 orbs of light changing colour (red, orange, yellow, ...). I know its just an airplane or a heliopter or something like that but it was so awesome! It brightened up my day a lot! thanks!

...puting my phone into my drawer was usless i just heard it vibrate -.- never mind its not X don't care. Haha X will never reply because X is an annoying idiot! Good that I realized it now.

2011-11-26T20:40:00.002+08:00

I realize the stuff I write on my blog is very shallow and materialistic compared to this one . I should be a 15 year old like I really am and talk about...pizza, television, youtube stuff i dunno! but that's what I normally do anyway, so writing it about it here is useless.

HAHA facebook just screwed up on me. I feel fantastic. But I'm bored. Oh my god I am always bored and I am always hungry I should stop whining. I AM A WHINERRRRRRRRRRRRR. WHICH SUCKS. I should stop complaining. Complaining will get me nowhere unless after complaining, I actually do something afterwards!!!! I think we complain because we take things for granted, and we complain because we want someone else to do something.

So complaining = lazy and taking things for granted. But complaining is different from voicing out your opinions. I think there's a huge difference, just that I can't really find the difference. I think its the purpose and the tone? WHY AM I EVEN WRITING ABOUT THIS CRAP!

I miss year 2 days. The days where I had less people to talk to and think about. And all I focused on was like 207 and homework, nothing else. I think I should focus on my studies in Year 4, and forget about some people :/

2011-11-26T20:33:00.002+08:00

After spending so long being annoyed and angry, I suddenly miss X.

2011-11-25T22:08:00.002+08:00

I had to take a long walk at night today, just because I saw facebook again. Going on facebook and seeing X's updates gives me a stomachache, I just don't know why. It's damn annoying.

I wish I never had to talk to anyone again, I just want, I just need to be alone! On an island, sunbathing and drinking juice, watching the sunset. Or on a hammock, in a forest, 50 feet above the ground. Or just at home, watching Television and eating ice-cream, with the knowledge I never have to worry about people ever again.

I'm starting to find company annoying.
I'm starting to fidn the whole idea of people annoying.
What's happening to me?
I wonder if I'm going psycho.

Being alone is wonderful. No commitment to anyone, no promises, no strings attached. No proper behaviour, nobody to tie you down. Then again, nobody to share the nice stuff with. But all the "nice stuff" is a result of people anyway. It's like that show "I Am Legend" where there's only 1 man left in the city.

Sometimes I wish I was Will Smith. But then again, he missed human company in the end. Talking to mannequins he set up himself haha. I miss human company when I want to have someone to talk to. Is that selfish? It could be. But I don't think it is.

Things to do

2011-11-21T22:21:00.003+08:00

I need to work on Valentine's Day Booth Ideas. Why do I...not have any ideas? It's like my mind is a huge blank. I think it's because I don't really really really want to be a part of this committee anyway. Shouldn't have signed up just because others were. Never mind, since I'm in it, I'll just do my best. Will come up with something tomorrow!

Facebook is a lot more manageable now because that person doesn't really use it either haha.

Failing.

2011-11-20T21:24:00.006+08:00

It's a question of perspective.

I feel like I'm a failure because I'm too lazy; I miss opportunities, I don't lead a fulfilling, honest life (even though I probably can). It does seem sad when I can only work on exams, because exams don't affect anybody else except myself (to a certain degree).

When other people are sad because of school results, it makes me feel...dismayed. Like, it's just a result, it's just lines of ink, they'll fade, it affects your future minimally, it's not a judgement of your mental ability. I can take pride in results because it's something that I put in maximum effort to control, so when I do well, it feels good.

So, when people start talking about how much their life sucks because of school, I want them to think about people who have lives like mine! But then, I realize that a lot more people have lives even worse than mine.

Poverty

Abuse

Addiction

Illness

But that's just 1 side of things. All the time, I feel like I'm a hypocrite, that I'm this fake contrary bastard who has an able body, a functioning mind, and yet I can't make good use of them. Because I'm lazy. Not lazy to study, but lazy to live. I don't want to live an achromatic life just because of one person. It's a waste.

But I can't help myself, and there's the crux of the problem.

So, in order to live happy lives, we should learn how to do our best. Expectations and targets come hand-in-hand with failure, so if we have no expectations, no targets, we'll have no failures. But it's weird to try to do your best in something without a target.

But certain circumstances need..minimum standards. Why has society evolved as such? Why, as humans, do we develop different personalities, different reactions, and different understandings of the world? Life is hard. Because of differences. It's because of differences that make us feel like failures - mostly, I think its because of differences between people (e.g. who has a better body, a better husband, a better job).

When we think a part of us is not as good as someone else's* part (could be your own physical "part" verus your mental "part" - your target), sometimes we think we failed.

So actually, there's no need to feel like a failure! As long as you did your best! If certain things are just unachievable, it's better to try! at least you know now it's unattainable. I must be more positive! I think i am very pessimistic which sucks! I am pessismistic about my own pessimism lmao.

So in the end, we aren't failures. We are...succesors? haha english failure never mind.

Stories

2011-11-18T22:01:00.003+08:00

4.8! I am so pleased with myself right now haha.
more than i should be hmmm.
must be humble and work harder next year!
and start exercising!
and stop wasting time on television.
Do more art! Write more!!!!!

English: A-
Higher Chinese: A-
Biology: A
Chemistry: A
Physics: A
Maths: A+
Art: B+

HAHAHA I GOT A- FOR HIGHER CHINESE.

2011-11-18T21:56:00.004+08:00

why do you have to react? i just don't get it.
Don't go back to that please.
No wonder...this morning. damnit.

Can you only like the nice* side of somebody?
Or do you take the nasty side as well?
Do you try to change that person?
Or do you try to let them stay the same?

I shouldn't be the one thinking about this.

2011-11-16T22:35:00.001+08:00

i sign in on facebook & I already can't stand it. Logging off after 2 minutes -.-
Facebook, screw you. I have too many personal issues now.

2011-11-14T22:00:00.000+08:00

To be beyond sadness.

2011-11-12T21:52:00.005+08:00

Tumblr Tumblr Tumblr why must you lag on me?
My browser has crashed at least 3 times already.
I think there's something wrong with my computer.

I don't like being alone /forever alone.
What to do what to dooooooooooooo?
If I wanna talk to that person I should just talk
But that person probably finds it so awkward,
even though that person said it doesn't feel awkward
but hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........it's still awkward.

Could that person just SMS me or something?
anything, just some lame thing about homework.
I think it means something when you remember someone's number.
I only remember 4 numbers. From my two classes.

I am so pathetic.
and It sucks to like somebody.

It just has to rain when I'm feeling down WHY?

2011-11-10T20:15:00.007+08:00

Need to be happier! Why am i posting on my blog marks.
Oh yeah to remind myself to work harder next year for everything!

Physics - 84/100
Biology - 75/100

Wow didn't expect the A for physics. thought i was gonna get B max.
I knew Bio was screwed when everyone got like C+ to B.
Can't believe I got A- but I studied like crap so...it's worth it I guess.
Class average is 64 haha. How the hell did people get 88 wow.

Bio teachers are really grouchy and PMS-y. Especially Mr. Seoh.
I might start ignoring that person. it's what happens I guess.
Oh I got into Valentine's Day OC. I have Uyen to talk too thank god.
So going to fail SDYC interview. I'll try my best! Feels like council all over again.

I need to find an outlet for boredom and sadness.
Must turn negative emotions into positive energy!
That's like our chinese comprehension. Morality discursive essays.

Art Club Leadership! I really really want a position oh damn.
I told Ms. K I can be responsible enough to take on that role.
I know I can be responsible enough! I Must be more conscientious and proactive.
But I'm not nominating myself because well, I have no idea what role is suited to me.
Part of her decision is based on the Jung Personality test? interesting.

I wonder what stuff ENFP/INFPs can do.
I'm sort of half-extroverted and half-introverted.

I feel like going to school by myself and earlier tomorrow just to meet....yeah. It would be funny to meet that person on the MRT tomorrow morning. But it's not going to happen. I've wanted to so many times but it just doesnt happen. "Us" just doesn't happen. But I'll still go. Talking to that person is fun! and that person is fun! and retarded. but still awesome. Just that I'm not nice to talk to. I am a boring, boring person.

I miss good times. If there ever were good times.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

11/11/11.

English - 18/25
Chemistry - 64/80
Maths - 60/65

I feel a bit sad about english, awesome about chemistry and maths! Chem is because I got A, maths is...yeah.

Chinese:

Letter - 16/20
Compo - 46/70
Paper - 86.5/110
Total - 148.5/200

My chinese percentage is higher than my english haha. Everybody improved by so much it's crazy. I feel much better this semester actually for exams. Because I studied for things.

2011-11-09T15:35:00.007+08:00

I can't get on fricking Tumblr because my computer lags
I wish i was more artistic, hardworking and creative
Then I might not be getting low grades for Art stuff.

Photography - B
Photo Editing - B
Breadth 1 - C+
Breadth 2 - B
Breadth 3 - A
Presentation - B+

I got B+ overall.
Because Breadth 3 has the most weightage in my final grade ha!
This post is like a reminder to myself to like, work harder.
And to consult Ms. K for every single art piece I need to do.
And to spend >4 hours on each art piece so I can get at least a B.

Haha reading past posts. I was so immature.
I feel a bit better now because I use normal english.

2011-11-08T22:02:00.010+08:00

I'm writing normally for once.

DAMN waiting for IC registration was freaking stupid.

Six people cut my queue! and it was freaking cold!

But never mind I got to watch Andy's anime so it's fine.

Andy's anime is seriously screwed.

I feel like going to watch it now haha.

But I don't really want to screw up my brain

207 people abandoned me to have lunch!

It's really awkward hanging around couples.

Playing gooseberry is not fun. at all.

But I have a class Jacket now! yeah!

Art meeting! Our idea is so awesome!

Instruments + organs (made of clay)

Because the theme for this year's SYF is:

The Symphonic Canvas.

It's so complicated and chim.

I need to think of a good title for our piece.

After discussing, we played with Yang Gan's iPad.

Angry Birds, Plant vs. Zombies and Fruit Ninja!

I need to improve my Fruit Ninja skills.

Better (general) hand-eye coordination would be nice.

Then, we spent 30 minutes waiting for Ms. K,

so we could submit our proposal for SYF.

But she didn't turn up after her meeting.

so Chen Lin asked me to call her (using her phone).

Which was a smart move, because I got scolded by Ms.K.

Scolded for assuming that her meeting was in school.

Stupid PMS. Most retarded thing on the world.

I have Art tomorrow! Four hours oh gosh.

Four irritating hours with Ms. PMS.

Should I sign up for volunteering?

I need to occupy my time with loads of stuff,

so I don't have to think about things.

2011-11-06T21:06:00.002+08:00

Why did you have to come back today?

2011-11-02T17:22:00.001+08:00

I should care less about marks.

BUT HA I DIDNT SCREW UP PHYSICS
BUT HA I DIDNT SCREW UP MATHS.

i should not be happy about not screwing up
i should be happy that they're almost over.
1 month yes! then I can forget

2011-10-31T18:46:00.002+08:00

haha screwed up bio. 4 marks!!!!!!!!!!!!
screwed up english. LOOL missed the entire essay point.

going home today was weird and awkward haha.

PHYSICS. I CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

2011-10-29T17:23:00.002+08:00

You can turn wine into water
turn sadness into laughter
But you know you can never make me love you more.

Let the sky fall down
Let the leaves turn brown
Still you know you can never make me love you more.

hahahhhhahahahhaaha wtfbbq ok bye...

2011-10-27T20:09:00.000+08:00

hmph im happy today.

hmph.

2011-10-25T20:13:00.003+08:00

I wish that you thought that I was the reason you were in the world.
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile.

I wish you can't figure me out.

I wish you'd hold my hand.

I wish that without me your heart would break.

I wish that without me you would spend the rest of nights awake.
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep.

I wish we could be something.

All I know is that you're the nicest person I've ever seen.

2011-10-24T21:19:00.002+08:00

1. Where is the boy you like now? Home.

2. What were you doing Friday night? Watching TV!

3. Name something you did yesterday? I though this was sick -.- Maths file.

4. Last person you text messaged? Esther

5. Who was the last person to call you? Grandma

6. What are you doing right now? This.

7. Next time you travel out of the country where will it be to? Norway.

8. What color are your eyes? Brown.

9. Are you allergic to anything? Yes.

10. Are you dating the last person you kissed? no.

11. Last place you ordered food from? Ichiban sushi.

12. Who was the last person you shared a bed with? Dad.

13. What color is your hair? Black/brown/gold.

14. Do you remember singing any songs as a kid? Yes.

15. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Ew god no.

16. Who knows a secret or two about you? 5 people.

17. When was the last time you lied? Today.

18. Do you like fire? BURN BABY BURN.

19. Did you have a nap today? No.

20. What is your favorite drink? Dunno.

21. What do you wear more, jeans or sweats? Sweats. Dont like jeans.

25. Where did you get the shirt you’re wearing now? Orientation 2011 :)

26. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? Yes.

28. Is anyone jealous of you? -

30. Have any regrets? Lots of em.

31. Where were you 1 hour ago? Here.

32. Where were you 8 hours ago? Alone.'

35. Has anyone ever told you that they like you more than as a friend? ...no.

37. Is cheating ever okay? Depends on the situation...

38. Who was the last person you rode in a car with? Dad.

39. What are you looking forward to? A smile.

41. Have you kissed anyone in the past week? No.

43. What are you listening to? Love On Top.

45. Favorite Sports Team? -

46. What song do you want played at your funeral? Walking on Sunshine

47. What were you doing 12 AM last night? Lying in my bed not sleeping.

48. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? nothing.

49. Who will you be with this Saturday night? Nobody i want to be with.

50. What woke you up this morning? Alarm.

52. Is tomorrow going to be a good night? I WANT IT TO BE.

53. Did you kiss or hug anyone today? I WANT TO.

55. How many myspace accounts do you have? 0.

56. Do or did you like school? Yes!

56. Would you take a bullet for anyone? Depends on who.

57. Where would you like to live? ...in .

58. Do long distance relationships work? Sometimes? Not all the time,

59. Does your crush like you? NO. I don't think so.

60. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Forever Alone. In University,

61. Have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? Nope.

62. Does a kiss make your cuts feel better? Yes.

63. Have you ever passed out on the bathroom floor? No.

64. Can you cook? Define cook. Maybe?

65. What shoe do you put on first, left or right? Right.

66. Have you ever brushed your teeth while in the shower? Yes.

67. Have you had more than 3 boyfriends/girlfriends at the same time? Nope.

68. Have you ever thought about your death? Definitely.

69. Whats your hair color? Black/Brown/Gold.

70. Where do you put your towel after taking a shower? On the rack.

71. What color is your shower curtain? Door?

72. Have you ever had stitches? No.

74. Did you believe that girls have cooties? LOL NO.

75. Do you know how to use chop sticks? Yes. Sort of. No -.-

76. Can you finish the phrase, “Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?” Yes, I can.

78. Do you sometimes believe that guys have PMS? YES I HAVE IT.

79. Who was the last person you couldn’t take your eyes off of? The person _ _ _ _ _ _ _ / _ _ _ _/ _ _/me

80. Have you ever given money to a homeless person? I dunno,

81. Have you ever run over an animal? Yes. I was 5 it was an ant i didnt know.

82. What is your favourite cereal? Lucky Charms.

83. Have you ever had an Oreo with peanut butter? Nope!

84. Have you gotten a text today? Yes.

85. Do you think its right for straight guys to get their tongue pierced? Uhhh...I think that's weird but its their choice.

86. Where’s your favorite place to be? next to _ _ _ _ _ _

88. It’s Wednesday afternoon, where are you usually? School.

89. Who are the last four people to send you a text message? Esther, Ms.K, Andy, Dawn.

91. What are you listening to? Nothing now.

92. Your christmas list consists of? Just one person.

93. Your ex just asked you out and you say? Depends.

94. You’re going to New York for school shopping, where do you go first? FOOD! FOOD! FOOD!

95. You need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go to first? Dont like jeans,

96. How do you feel about your hair? I should go cut it.

97. What time do you wake up for school? 6.00 - 6.45 depending on how i feel.

98. What movie is in your DVD player? Inception.

99. Last two numbers in your phone number? 86.

100. Who calls you by a nickname? Uh. Dunno. 305 ppl.

101. What side of the bed do you sleep on? Left. nearer and facing the window.

102. Do you like roller coasters? YES!

103. Favorite T.V. show? Dunno,

104. Your last IM was from? James.

105. Favorite Beverage? Dunno.

106. When’s the next time you’ll kiss someone of the opposite sex? Dunno.

107. What do your pants look like? Saggy.

108. Are you tired? No.

109. Do you have to pee? No.

110. Would you kiss the cook of tonights dinner? NO! The old chicken rice auntie WTF.

111. Laugh much? No, I'm a sad person :(

112. What are your plans for Saturday? stay alone at home and study.

114. Favorite sit down restaurant? Dunno.

115. Bubble gum flavor of choice? Dunno.

116. What do you want to be when you grow up? Dunno.

117. The most excitement you had this week? KEEPING IT PRIVATE.

118. What do you usually order at Taco Bell? Haven’t eaten there before.

119. Have you ever sat all the way through Gone With the Wind? Huh? Don’t think so?

120. When was the last time you were up all night? Marine Bio Field Trip.

121. Where is your favorite place? _ _ _ _ to _ _ _ _ _ _

122. Do you ever think about the price of gasoline? No.

123. Do you sleep with a fan on? No.

124. What’s the best thing about winter? SNOW! and nice scenery haha.

125. How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking? all the time.'

126. How many states have you been to? None?

127. Are you currently planning a trip? No.

128. Who was the last person you read something out loud to? Forgot.

129. Last time you forced yourself to do something? Today.

130. Have you ever googled your name and found somebody? Yes.

140. Who’s your number one? im not answering this.

141. Can you drive? No.

142. What makes you feel like you are young again? TV shows i used to watch.

143. Do you ever type “kik” or “;p’;” instead of “lol”? never.

144. Do you know how to play chess? No. I suck.

145. Whats on your mind right now? That person.

STALKER

2011-10-23T22:58:00.004+08:00

tcah.
DUDE SERIOUSLY?
WTF.
LOL.
HEY!
mean -,-
lol you deserve it.
SICKO!
awwwww.
wow you changed a lot.
OHhhhhh...
things make more sense now.
Asshole.
WHY?
lazy.
idiot.
LOL.
You are such a tool.
Woah badass.
fucker.
Sorry I'll never do that.
you make me feel sad.
hahaha.
HOLY SHIT YOU BEAT ME!
I'm sorry I'm not as ____.
lol same.
That's nice.
OUCH! you're fine now anyway.
Have a nice trip!
Bye.
Right back here.

why did you stop, anyway?

This is meaningful to me.

2011-10-23T22:13:00.001+08:00

[c=4]Akira[/c] says:
hi everyone!
MBK says:
sup
[c=4]Akira[/c] says:
why is it that there are more people online
towards the exam period
MBK says:
idk
procrastination

[c=4]Akira[/c] says:
haha
what're you doing?
btw btw any nice
books to recommend?
MBK says:
DUUUUUNE
lol
er not reading much now
waiting for the last inheritance book
[c=4]Akira[/c] says:
oh yea
when's that coming out?
MBK says:
sometime in november
[c=4]Akira[/c] says:
oh awesome
lend me if you buy it
MBK says:
haha
sure

Dawn Oh has left the conversation.

Dawn Oh was added to this conversation. Handwriting is no longer supported because not all participants can view handwritten messages. Handwritten messages will be sent as text.

Benedix has been added to the conversation.

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] has been added to the conversation.

pin has been added to the conversation.

MBK has been added to the conversation.

[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] has been added to the conversation.

Benedix has been added to the conversation.

Chue has been added to the conversation.

pin says:
haha but when you reach she'll be gone
xD
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i was just going to go tiong bahru
ohh

Dawn Oh has been added to the conversation.

[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha then nvm i go tiong bahru
but it sucks there
there's only sweettalk
MBK says:
lolll
get stawberry milk instead then :/
pin says:
strawberry ice blended + strawberry jelly

MBK says:
lol
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
idk where to find
this sucks
okay
soon
i will mug
Chue says:
hi
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hi!
omg hi haha
please tell me you're not mugging
oh but doesnt really matter anyway
Chue says:
um
hm
i doing maths tutorial n watching eagle eye
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
(i am strawberry milk)
Chue says:
is that counted
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
eagle eye?
Chue says:
i know
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
what's that
Chue says:
its not that colour
i think its lighter
the movie
on channel 5
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
wait
i needa change my name
MBK says:
eagle eye rocks lol
[c=4]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
nvm my strawberry milk is concentrated
Chue says:
lol i watched it before
watching it again >_>

MBK says:
srawberry condensed milk
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
lol
bored humans
MBK says:
crap im salivating
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
condensed strawberry milk
Chue says:
don like milk don like condensed milk only like strawberry : D

MBK says:
XDD
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
pfft
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER~
Chue says:
oh yeah for maths tutorial must we do every single part of every single question? >_>
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
echo: (~FOREVER~)
Dawn Oh says:
yes. just baked cookies again
Chue says:
rotten strawberry milk
expired
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha omg yay dawn!
Chue says:
stinky
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
you're not mugging!
Dawn Oh says:
and scrolled through the mess of pink strawberry
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
O:
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
lets start mugging tmr!
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
u can bake?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i swear i will start mugging tmr
Dawn Oh says:
i dun feel like mugging...
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
yea mugging in groups
is better
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea tmr!
Dawn Oh says:
but OKAY I WILL TRY
MBK says:
yea
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
SAME
MBK says:

[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER~
echo: forever~
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
nvm la at most we will end up playing cards
Dawn Oh says:
btw can lend lena's bio notes tmr i go read
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
or talking crap
MBK says:

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
no harm done
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh dawn
yea sure
but
do you want me to send you
some
summaries for bio notes
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
bio
notes
from
Dawn Oh says:
you have?
wow
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
since i read through first four now!
Dawn Oh says:
awesome
MBK says:
eh actly some summaries would b nice XD
Dawn Oh says:
much appreciated!
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
err i just made summary of 1/2 for nat
yea k i send both of you now
MBK says:
i havent filled in most of mine lol
too busy sleeping
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
err it is like
Dawn Oh says:
oh dear having summaries makes me feel less hardworking haha.
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha yea
MBK says:

thats a good thing
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
but i summarised from lena's notes, which are fong's notes
Chue says:
i can only do revision before the exam >_>
Dawn Oh says:
^everything is in shades of pink
thats even better
like, 100 fold
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea ikr haha
Chue says:
read the textbook instead of notes i think its better
Dawn Oh says:
i dont own textbooks
never bought
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
but erm i summarised without looking at the notes
so it might leave out a bit here and there
MBK says:
th textbooks quite good leh
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
so you might want to check with the proper notes and stuff
Dawn Oh says:
s'okay, i'll run through the notes tmr and double check
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
but should be 90% accurate!

Dawn Oh says:
haha yea

Dawn Oh has left the conversation.

[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
ahhhhh
she abandoned us!

Dawn Oh has been added to the conversation.

MBK says:
lol
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh haha
hi dawn
Dawn Oh says:
hihi? xD
Chue says:
dawn what were you baking?
Dawn Oh says:
chocolate chip cookies
its the only thing i know how to
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
hey hey dawn u can bake?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yes she can!
very well!
Dawn Oh says:
i'm very bad at bread or cakes haha.. -.-
Chue says:
make more
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
is it a way to procastinate
Chue says:
than bring 2moro
I KNOW BREAD!
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
*then
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
effeciently?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yesssss
Chue says:
i can do that!
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
btw err nat
help me print out
my bio notes
haha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
no printer
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
thanks
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i always as
king
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
kk
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
around
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
dawn/abdur
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
to print waht
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
help me print out
the summary
Dawn Oh says:
okkk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
thanks
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
oh yea
Dawn Oh says:
remind me again
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i need someone
Dawn Oh says:
at 11
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
print out
fake tutorial 3
Dawn Oh says:
fake?
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
so i can fake i did it
yea wahtever tutorial 3
the solution
or answer key
Dawn Oh says:
oh nooo
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
or question paper
Dawn Oh says:
i havent done math file stuff
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
becoz i lost it
and my math test 1
is missing too
):
Dawn Oh says:
lost it in sch?
might have been on the floor
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
nope at home
i think
):
Dawn Oh says:
oh good luck finding
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
nvm i still got 30/30
i jsut get my mom find it ba
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
that's mean
meanie
i spit on you!
spitspitspit
MBK says:
aiyoh go find it yourself lol
xj stop spitting lol
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i have a lot of spit haha
cant blame me
Dawn Oh says:
i have a desert for a mouth =(
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
lol
sry lor
im still rushing cs
Dawn Oh says:
since i'm on perma-dehydration
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
the fucking report
Chue says:
strawberry milk spit?
that is like moldy milk curd
Dawn Oh says:
melon curd is quite nice
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
strawberry milkshake!

Dawn Oh has left the conversation.

Dawn Oh has been added to the conversation.

[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hello dawn!
do you notice anything different about me?
Dawn Oh says:
?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hint
look at my dp!
Dawn Oh says:
haha!
strawberry milk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
YESSSS
haha shit
i sound so deranged
lets play some game
truth or dare
Dawn Oh says:
i'm forbidden to drink strawberry milk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
shoot shag marry
or shoot sex marry idk
Dawn Oh says:
oh nooo
shag i think?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
is it cos of your lactose intolerant thing?
okay shag then
haha sounds like a dog
Dawn Oh says:
yeap
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i used to want a dog when i was younger
did you?
Dawn Oh says:
i got scared when i ran from a neighbours dog
and it was bigger than me
and it chased me around the house
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
how small were you haha
Dawn Oh says:
no ideaa
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
maybe it wasn't actually i dog
*a dog
Dawn Oh says:
but then it put its paws on a boys chest and when it dragged down he got scars for a week
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
it could have been your neighbour in a dog costume
oh
woah shit
that's scary
wait
Dawn Oh says:
then when i grew up i thought dogs smell and drooled everywhere haha
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
scars for a week?
Dawn Oh says:
err injury
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh haha
Dawn Oh says:
'scar'
MBK says:
ugh
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hello abdur!
Dawn Oh says:
hello pinky
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
notice anything diff about me?
k this is lame
i feel lame
and boring
Dawn Oh says:
its funny
xD
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
ah well
it is?
cool okay haha
MBK says:
whats different lol
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i had tomato sauce for dinner
hint
look at my dp!
Dawn Oh says:
its like someone saying something, getting a reaction, then going to another person and repeating exactly
MBK says:
wohhh
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea haha
MBK says:
stwawbewwies
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
that's why i feel quite stupid
YES
MBK says:
milk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
STRAWBERRY MILK <3
okay haha
if wx or nat or pin comes
i will say the same thing haha
MBK says:
lol k
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
can
anyone
offer a printer
?
Chue says:
what
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hello nat!
hello wx!
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
hi?
Chue says:
say what thing
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
notice anything different about me?
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
shorter than ever?
Chue says:
ur dp is now a strawberry milkshake -.-
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
no!
yes haha
Chue says:
sorry strawberry milk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
5 points to wx!
Chue says:
nat you fail : D
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i know
i saw it
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
nat is kicked out of hogwarts!
Chue says:
its because i scrolled up lol
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
abt at 915
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh cheh haha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i also scrolled up
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
both fail!
pin says:
hi
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hi pin!
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
lol hi pin
Chue says:
nat scrolled up and got it wrong!

pin says:
your dp is now a strawberry milk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
have you read the chat above/
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
the difference
is the dp
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh
haha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
LOL
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
shit haha
how do all of you know
kk haha
next time
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
scroll up?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i will talk to you people
individually
hmph
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
next time u should do this

see blank screen
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
no diff if the person likes scrolling up
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
do it alot
so i seems like
pin says:
lol
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
centrureis
pin says:
i'll still scroll slowly
hahahaha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
lol
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea see haha
no diff
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
waste ur time ;D
MBK says:
lol nat i thought my msn was bugged O.O
Chue says:
how to say that a function is always increasing
*prove
nvr mind sorry
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
it is
always increasingg
pin says:
omg
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
an increasing function>?
pin says:
andy warhol said "Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets."
Chue says:
nvr mind i remembered sorry thanks!
THAT IS SAD
MBK says:
who is andy warhol
Chue says:
i will never have sex D:
pin says:
an artist
Chue says:
an old artist
MBK says:
cue why?
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
lol
MBK says:
*chue
Chue says:
i think screen sex is boring already >_>
MBK says:
lol
well, you dont know it till youve tried it
pin says:
he also said "The most exciting thing is not doing it. If you fall in love with someone and never do it, it's much more exciting. "
O_______O

cl has been added to the conversation.

MBK says:
lol
Chue says:
OK haha
pin says:
gosh he died before he was 60
LOL
MBK says:
btw sex is good cardio
XD
ahahaha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
^scientifically proven
MBK says:
yup
was about to say tht
pin says:
oh no
c.s lewis died 7 days before her birthday
that is so sad
MBK says:
whose birthday?
cs lewis was a guy
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea haha
i thought cs lewis was a guy
MBK says:
go google him
he was a fat balding guy when he died i think
pin says:
rly shit
MBK says:
MJ died on my bday
lol
pin says:
i thought he was a female
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha
MBK says:
LOL
pin says:
they didnt state the gender thr
MBK says:
meh
Chue says:
haha wth
pin says:
on the website i'm looking at
MBK says:
i thought jk rowling was a guy
pin says:
omg
MBK says:
XDD
pin says:
william shakespeare died three days before he's brithday ):
*his
MBK says:
then they put her face on the back of 1 of the books
and i was like O___0*
lol
nvm i never liked shakespeare
XP
pin says:
bohr said "A physicist is just an atom's way of looking at itself. "
MBK says:
ok i dont understand
pin says:
nor do i
MBK says:
physicist=atoms?
pin says:
ahahah
MBK says:
tht explains why some of them are so short
lololol
they guy who proved e=mc^2 died the day i was born
lol
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha abdur
did you go and research so deeply on your birthday
MBK says:
its on google O.O
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
or did you discover all that by chance
Chue says:
D:
thats so depressing
MBK says:
but MJ DIED ON MY BDAY TOO
lol
no its not
pin says:
no one seems to be born or die on my bday
*dead
MBK says:
they have this huge memorial thing every year lol
Chue says:
charles dickens was born on my bday!
pin says:
omg
MBK says:
woh cool
pin says:
i almost thought someone had the
same birthday as me
MBK says:
dude you are OLD
pin says:
at first glance
then i read it again
Chue says:
as in lol
whoops
i phrased wrongly
pin says:
and it was June 27 -___-
Chue says:
aw
are you looking at wiki?
pin says:
nope

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] has left the conversation.

Chue says:
7th February, 1984 : Astronaut Bruce McCandless unhooked a lifeline and became the first human to fly free in space

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] has been added to the conversation.

[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hi nat!
Chue says:
need to do tutorial 6.3?
MBK says:
no
apparently its too cheem or sth
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i did it
anyway
Chue says:
HAHA YES I FINALLY FINISHED REDOING ALL MY TUTORIAKS
*tutorials
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
LOL
i didnt do anything
at
tutorial 3-4
Chue says:
i lost all of them >_>
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i did everything else
my trigo deproved
Chue says:
oh

Dawn Oh has left the conversation.

Chue says:
maybe you never revise
go revise
must go revise last sem maths!!!!!!!!! b;eh
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
im getting slower
i use to be 15 sec
now im like 30sec
im 2x slower
><
pin says:
-___-
Chue says:
>_>
pin says:
i'm like 10 mins
now i'm 300000 mins
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
wow
u took 5000 hours
which is

Dawn Oh has been added to the conversation.

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
208++ days
which is
pin says:
yupyup
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
2/3 of a year
wow
MBK says:
achievement unlocked
*slowpoke*
PRETTY CAR
http://ridestory.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/Lamborghini_Aventador.jpg
sry had to
its too awesome
pin says:
not badf
*bad
MBK says:
lol
go goole it
google

[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
around the world in 80 days!
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
oh wait
dawn
alena wants her bio notes bac
by tmr
dawn!
Dawn Oh says:
kk
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
morning!
oh haha
Dawn Oh says:
morning??

[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hey we can call you morning too right
all the synonyms of dawn
oh fuck i just rmbed lit
ahh
Dawn Oh says:
?
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i havent doneeeee
oh yea
send me the stuff i wrote?
Dawn Oh says:
?
oh
lemme go charge the laptop haha
i was gonna write mine up by tues and send her softcopy :X
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
have you done lit?
oh haha
i think that should be fine
Dawn Oh says:
havent done hahas -.-
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
haha neither have i!
i will start doing at 12
and read through bio at 11
and summarise bio at 1
wait
ahh
there's school tmr!
Chue says:
lol
MBK says:
LOL
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
;(
i am not happy there's school!
Dawn Oh says:
i agree!
i am not happy there's school!
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
yea
same
Dawn Oh says:
totally shd give us the entire week off
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
u know other sch
end le
Dawn Oh says:
not like we're gonna do any learning on mon and tues
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea man
and since there are breaks
Dawn Oh says:
and monday. FORMAL. argh
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
we'll prob play cards
ahh
pin says:
art..
i swear to do art tmr...
D:
Chue says:
xinpin i finished 1/3 of the cloud!

MBK says:
tmrw last formal
pin says:
gratz
MBK says:
just wear informal lol
pin says:
i did nothing
Chue says:
last chinese MUAHAA
pin says:
for presentation
MBK says:
wednesday no sch
Chue says:
shit i need to do my chiense file
and my art presentaton
i will be mugging on wed
pin says:
hey chue let's work on our presentation tmr
>.>
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hey hey dawn
so
pin says:
help me with it
xD
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i photocopy for you too?
Chue says:
loL ok
i bring laptop 2moro
has anybody finished their math file checking?
i dont wanna print out 20 tutorials >_>
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
hey dawn
hey heyyyyyyyyyy
since the notes i summarised
Dawn Oh says:
??
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
are basically alena's notes
pin says:
ms sie told me to hand in mine on monday
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
do you want me to help you photocopy as well
Chue says:
uh i didnt even tell her i was handing up when
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
or just photocopy parts that i never summarise
Chue says:
i just self-assumed monday
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
*i didnt summarise
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
yea
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
which i dont think is a lot
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i showed her once
she was like
Dawn Oh says:
lena said it's okay to give me notes till tues
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
go do this this this
then i was like
meh
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yay!
okay then
help me photocopy haha
Dawn Oh says:
i'll let my printer choke haha
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yesss haha
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
O:
Chue says:
>________.>
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
wait
so how
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
wx
would you like to bring your notes on monday
bio notes
thanks!
all of them!
lend alena
thank you very much
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
eh
pin says:
do you want me to lend her?
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
u know tutorial 3
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yes!
pin says:
i need to look for her anyway
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
can someone
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
please!
thanks
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
print the solution
for me
tq!
Chue says:
uhhhh i dont have all of them
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
i bringing bio notes
Chue says:
im photocopying julian's now
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
hopefully all of them,
yes!
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
woah
[i][c=12]Nathaniel[/c][/i] says:
do mine too
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
help me photocopy
haha
pin says:
i think i have all of them but they are not in order
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
i have half of them
and they're not filled in
pin says:
and some not filled in because some days i didnt bring them
Dawn Oh says:
i have a feeling nothing in robins notes is gonna be even remotely useful ANYWAY
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
xinpin ♥ STRAWBERRY says (10:09 PM):
*k haha
*erm
*ask her if she needs me to sign the random form for the function room thing
Chue says:
the textbook! THE TEXTBOOK!
it is like the most useful thing
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
the textbook is a shitload of shit
Chue says:
but it is useful
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
*useful shit then
but it is too much to learn
Chue says:
its because you remember everything that you see
like naturally
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
yea but the font size haha
Chue says:
i dont
pin says:
yeah my mum says need
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
and it is not natural goh
*gosh
Chue says:
i like the small font : /
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
my memory actually kinda sucks
idk haha it looks fuzzy when i rmb it
pin says:
i'm thinking of only scanning through bio, like enough to pass
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
cant see clearly
pin says:
then study more for chem ans physcis
*and
Chue says:
so. much. shit. for. every. subject.
[c=47]STRAWBERRY MILK FOREVER[/c] says:
xinpin ♥ STRAWBERRY says (10:11 PM):
*pass me tmr along with bio notes yay!

Dawn Oh has left the conversation.

pin says:
ahha okay sure
um um how long does she want it for?

Dawn Oh has been added to the conversation.

2011-10-22T20:50:00.004+08:00

Don't talk to me.
Don't listen to me.
Can't you just be mean to me?
Then maybe you'll be happier.

Screw this being sad is too easy.
And what's wrong with you?
I can't believe it you didn't listen to me.
I told you so. I told you so.
I wonder if you'll go through the same things,
the things I went through before you realize.

I want to stop whining.
The bitchiness builds up too fast.
Maybe I need a higher bitch threshold.
yeah. that'll do.

2011-10-15T20:41:00.002+08:00

I am a hypocrite.

It's like, you do well for a test. You say you're dumb. People get pissed. It's like, why do you get pissed? Why do you tell us to shut up? We got full marks because, even though we're dumb, we studied. we actually studied. BUT WE KNOW WE'RE DUMB. We're not trying to seek attention or trying to get compliments or pity. If we're dumb, and we think we're dumb, there's nothing wrong with admitting it to others.

In the end, it's a matter of perspective.
You think you're ugly, others don't.
You think you're fat, others don't.
It's only through realizing that you can never be at your best, that there's always room for improvement.

Strings

2011-10-11T20:33:00.004+08:00

If there's love, just feel it
If there's life, just live it.
This is no time to be alone.
I won't let you go.

If the sky is falling,

just take my hand and hold it.

This is no time to be alone.
I won't let you go.

I want to take drugs. Drugs.

2011-10-09T21:27:00.002+08:00

2011-10-09T20:36:00.001+08:00

You make me feel good about myself lol i dunno.

All

2011-10-08T00:51:00.002+08:00

all that I can see is just another lemon tree.

YOU MAKE ME SO FRUSTRATED WITH YOU.
TALK TO ME ABOUT SOMETHING.
talk to me now.
You make me laugh :)

Daydreamer

2011-10-06T23:10:00.002+08:00

You're leaving.
I don't know what to do.
I'm lost.

2011-10-05T21:02:00.002+08:00

So happy because 2day was such a nice day i dunno why i wanna laugh and keep laughing HAHA i dunno what to do now omg i wanna sleep i wanna relax.
I left all my stuff in school so I can't do any homework HAHA SO SLACK <3.

sorrryy zhichennnnnngggg i do davnci 2moro

Stone

2011-10-02T21:09:00.004+08:00

And I hear your words that you made up
You say my name like there could be an us.
I'd better tidy up my head
because I'm the only one in love.

I'm sick of home.
I'm sick of school.
I'm sick of holidays.
I'm sick of people.
I'm sick of food.
I'm sick of life.
I'm sick of you.
I'm sick of me.

Looking back at my old posts, I can't believe I typed such shit and put it on the internet. There's like, no flow, and I skip from 1 idea to the next in just a few lines. I hope I don't speak or write like that in real life

You

2011-09-30T22:45:00.000+08:00

ireallyreallylikeyou.

As of Now

2011-09-30T22:33:00.002+08:00

day 01 - your favorite song

My Love Is Like A Star

day 02 - your least favorite song

Hickory Tickory Tock

day 03 - a song that makes you happy

Some Hearts

day 04 - a song that makes you sad

Oh Boy

day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone

Hey Stephen

day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere

In A Heartbeat

day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event

The One That Got Away

day 08 - a song that you know all the words to

Turn Back Time

day 09 - a song that you can dance to

~anything~

day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep

Viva La Vida sorry

day 11 - a song from your favorite band

~

day 12 - a song from a band you hate

~

day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure

One Sweet Love

day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love

I'm Sexy and I know it

day 15 - a song that describes you

Human

day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate

~

day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio

T.G.I.F

day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio

Come Back

day 19 - a song from your favorite album

Like A Star

day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry

~

day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy

~

day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad

Hurt

day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding

Marry Me

day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral

Respect

day 25 - a song that makes you laugh

I Will Survive.

day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument

A Whole New World

day 27 - a song that you wish you could play

Uncharted

day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty

Man In The Mirror/
Temporary Home

day 29 - a song from your childhood

I LOVE YOU
YOU LOVE ME

day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

Hummingbird Heartbeat

Stars

2011-09-29T22:33:00.004+08:00

If you see a comet, baby I'm on it.
making my way back home.
Just follow the glow,
it won't be long, just know
that you're not alone.

today was really sad.
I don't know why I let people affect me so much.
Is it that obvious?
and they will never know.
It's sad.

Why don't you just kill me?

2011-09-11T12:58:00.003+08:00

-Art
-Da Vinci.

I know exactly what I want to do.
I know exactly when I have to do it.
I know exactly how I want it to turn out.
I know exactly why I have to do it.

I don't have the energy.

2011-09-11T12:57:00.001+08:00

day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

-

2011-08-05T00:21:00.002+08:00

You know I am like really tired right now. There's been so much going on with art and marine biology (and since I reach home at like 8 or 9 everyday I only get like 2 hours to do my homework).

Chem Assignment

Maths Journal

Maths Tutorials

Art Breadth Piece

Marine Bio Poster

Marine Bio Reflection

Marine Bio Scrapbook

Marine Bio Presentation

Marine Bio Commentary

Da Vinci Research

Chinese Compo

Chinese Workbook

Chinese Test Paper

English Letter

Physics Assignment

Art Club duties wtf -.-

+general revision.
LOL FML LOL I CAN GET THROUGH THIS THOUGH I KNOW IT >:D YEAH

2011-06-02T12:12:00.000+08:00

My lowest grade ever.
B.
For art.
WTF.

Exams

2011-05-22T21:33:00.005+08:00

4 months sinced I touched this thing WHOOOAAA.

Fuck exams fuck you seriously.

English: 38.5/50 (19 + 19.5)
Chinese: 125.5/200 (44 + 71.5)
Physics: 80/100 (30 + 50)
Maths: 39/60 (8 + 31)
Chem: 59/80 (12 + 47)
Bio: 60/80 (23 + 37)

I hate my marks. Except for Physics. Physics is pretty ok to me. But i made stupid mistakes but who cares its ok compared with my class ppl :D

I'm so disappointed with chem and bio though. C0uld have done better for both. Maths is terrible but everyone got low 30s so I'm pleased :D The only ppl who got ~40 is eliot the douchebag -.- (but how the hell did i fail MCQ)

And I beat xinyi in english.
She has never won me in english FK YEAH so awesome.

I'm ok with chinese. Yantong is like ZZZZZZZZZZ. Ze xuan owes me candyyyy. I think I'm like top of the singaporeans in my class (Xing Jing's half jap she doesn't count). I REGRET NOT WRITING FICTIONAL BULLSHIT FOR CHINESE

Woo!

2011-01-12T19:39:00.004+08:00

http://pass-me-by.tumblr.com/post/1591197084/letters

Thanks Yaazhini! I never read it before, but now I've read it. Thanks a lot! This (everything you see on this page) shouldn't mean anything. I won't be coming back here. So here is my last post ever.

#1 Mukesh
YO! You're kind of immature but you're really funny. Why are you leaving in Year 5? Sad, but I like all the MRT trips with you.

#2 Benedix
THanks for being in 305. Makes life more colourful haha. I think you're really funny, especially during boring lessons.

#3 Jaewoong
I didn't really talk to you much D: I guess I should have talked to you more, I guess (I dunno) but 10207 wouldn't be 10207 without you :D

#4 Wei Xuan
You are just awesome. Stand up Straight ;)

#5 Kai Hern
You remind me of a green bean. In a good way. You are awesome. I remember we only really met when I took 198 - You rock.

#6 Shi Yi
SIS! You are like, WHOOOOO! I think you are really cool. I like your laugh :D and you're one of the few people who pose when I take photos. NOBEL!

#7 Jia Ying
Piano Girl. I thought you were kind of weird HAHA. Spent a lot of time at fitness corner. I like the way you laugh haha. Be. More. Fantastic :D

#8 Gabriel
The game. Why you grow so tall over hols? D: Anyway, you are a great guy. I think you don't like shi yi either :)

#9 Matthew
Shorty pervert - you must be a nicer person D:<>#10 Samuel
ARRGH! Sam...you are so undescribable!!!! But you are cool! Continue being you! And I don't think you have a chinese/australian gf. If you do, I'm sorry :/

#11 Ze Xuan
Why..are...u...so...epic D:

#12 Yaazhini
Sentimental person from what you wrote of me. Thanks again! Fellow art/farad -ian! You rock.

#13 Yantong
SO. EPICALLY. VIOLENT. You really know how to motivate ppl You are an AWESOME person. Keep your hair short and keep hating pink :D

#14 Jing Wei
When I think of you I think of...books. Your hair is the best I have ever seen. Don't ever try to comb it again

#15 Chelsea
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH! you rock chelsea. you just do :D

#16 Frederick
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL the game LOL LOL LOL LOL :P

#17 Yong Kuan
Why so quiet? I didn't really talk to you in Year 1 D: But I know now you are a really cool person haha

#18 Gideon
what can I say? You're too smart for like...everybody :D You are pretty interchangeable :)

#19 Joel MUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAHHHHHAAAAAAAApedobearMMMMMMUAAAAAAAAHHAAAAAA. Joel. You. are. supercalifragilisticexpialidocious :D

#20 Masaki
ARRGH this is hard. I never really talked to u >.<>#21 Manish
Why-are-you-so-freaking-tall-and-freaking-awesome :D

#22 Fangyi
Hi fellow art-ian! You remind me of Ms. Sie - really cool lady.

#23 Tong Lin
Ex-wife...how's life? I saw you on TV your chinese is like so pro. Hope you like it in Dunman high (and this june I'm gonna be as moving as far as you :D)

No-one is gonna read these so HAHAHA

-

2010-12-21T13:51:00.002+08:00

Duffy's new stuff sucks.
AI albums are not-as-good-as-I-thought-they-would-be
MJ's is a cheap piece of marketing.

What's happened to everybody?

2010-12-16T19:00:00.004+08:00

I use perfect english and grammar (most of the time).

People must hate me for that haha.

WHY IS SINGAPORE NOT A RECOGNIZED WORD???? I hate you facebook.

^hehe facebook isn't a recognized word either.

Dumbledore isn't. Freakin Spellchecker.

I can sort of see the resemblance :O

The Rush is Never Ending

2010-12-13T17:15:00.006+08:00

I loved posting in 1 lines. I think I shall continue.
My holidays have been boring. I have nothing to do.

So I went Blog-surfing. Found quiz on fy's blog:

In front of you, you see a number of insects. How many are there? many.
You were walking through the jungle when you saw something move past you. What animal is it? Otter
You're sitting on a chair about to cross your legs. Which side of your leg do you cross over? Right
You're on a safari jeep driving through the Safari ranch, and you see a lion feeding on a dead animal carcass. How do you feel? The lion is pro; Sorry, dead Animal, R.I.P
When you usually pour a drink, up to which percentage of the cup do you pour? Depends on how much I wanna drink
There are candles burning in front of you. How many candles are there? Lots
A ship ready to take off by the harbour, makes a blasting horn sound. How long does it go on for? Eternity
You went into a room and it's all white, how do you feel? Relaxed
You're walking through a desert, how many pairs of shoes would you take with you? One, super durable pair
You feel like drinking hot chocolate, and you open the cupboard. How many cups are there? The same number as the portions of hot chocolate
A baby is crying, the doorbell's ringing and water is boiling on the stove. In what order would you resolve the situation? Door 1st, then baby, then water (the person can help)
You see an abandoned property (house.) Is the door open or closed? Open
You get on a plane for the first time. How do you feel during takeoff? I Excited
You design your own house and draw a house plan. In the living room, is the ceiling considerably high or low? Super High
You see an angel of death. He said that he'll give you one day to do whatever you want before he takes you to the afterlife. Who would you spend the one last day on earth with? Everybody.

Write your answers of the respective questions above as answers below:

The number of people who piss you off right now. Many :P
How people see you. Otter O.O
What you see in people (Left - appearance, Right - Personality) Personality
The feeling after watching porn for the first time. The Lion is Pro, Sorry Dead Animal R.I.P (Wtf?)
The level of your self-esteem. Depends on how much I want to drink
The number of people you can love at the same time. Lots :O
Average time you spend kissing. Eternity :P
Feeling right before your death. Relaxed
The number of relationships you will have before marriage. One
The number of your TRUE friends. Depends on the amount of portions???
What you value the most in the opposite sex. Water - Wealth / Baby - Virtue / Doorbell - Appearance. Appearance > Virtue > Wealth
The door represents your heart. Open
Feeling after 'first kiss'. Excited
The level of your pride. Super High.
Who do you wanna see now? EVERYBODY GODDAMIT I AM SO BORED

Ok, that was weird. Oh and for No. 10 I opened my kitchen cupboard and counted 17.

The weird thing is, for that question, I initially put the number 17 (just for fun),

but decided it made no sense and said the practical thing>

I found out there were actually 17 packets in my kitchen cupboard.

My. Mind. Is. Blown.

Btw, what colour is glass?

2010-12-09T22:15:00.000+08:00

Hey Jack, Screw you.
I've had enough.
I hate myself, you know?

You think it's weird,
but I'm the one who has to live with the labels.
I know I went too far,
and I'm sorry.

2010-12-09T08:24:00.005+08:00

9/12/11

Memories

Resting my head on your shoulder (*)
Helping you with chem and bio quiz
Hug! (Youth Week, Bio)
Going home with you<
Talking to you at 12am
Everything about you
Everything you said
Racism
Playing Halo (that was really really stupid)
You are really really stupid
Friendzoning me (damn)

Actually the list goes on and on in my head;
too bad we have finite moments.

not talking to you for 1 day makes me feel really really empty.
Not sadness, because I should be happy you aren't talking anymore...
Being happy about who you are, not what you mean to me.

Which is everything.
I don't think it goes the other way.

The moon revolves around the earth, which revolves around the sun.
But the earth will pull closer to the sun, as the moon moves further.
I don't know why we even started talking or got to know each other.

I still know what you said when I asked why you didn't mind sitting next to me!
"You can help me with...you know...quizzes and homework and stuff".
Oh my god I am leaking tears.

2010-12-02T09:52:00.003+08:00

The school has fucked up our next year's classes. I feel a bit weird to be in the same class as Ben - pfft. I'm separated from all the Art-Humans People too. So obviously, it's not just by Humanities. I'm in 305 - it is so awkward when you don't know somebody in that class, when upon researching you find that you are friends on Facebook...

107, 207, 307

Same mentor too.
Lucky Manish, now that I think about it :/

Year 3 Classes of 2011 [Pirateb]
Year 3 Classes of 2011 [Shiyang]

All the Year 3 classes have people only from a max of 6 Year 2 classes. Huh. Saving space for the newcomers I guess. Now to educate you in English.

DUTCH MUDSLIDE
Similar to a Dutch Oven. When one of the two people in the same bed farts, and blasts an accidental discharge of fecal matter instead of just gas on to the other person.

You did not need to know that.

2010-11-27T22:38:00.002+08:00

OMG BLOGGER I TYPE 1000+ ESSAY AND YOU DELETE IT WTF

Being Human

2010-11-26T19:07:00.003+08:00

It has taken me about 4 days to post this because my cousin and I are sharing the computer and I'm taking the chance when he's in the bathroom to have a little privacy.

Being Human is hard.

Always harder than I thought it would be. Then I saw two documentaries on History and Okto - Beyond Sex, and Being Human. Beyond Sex was about...genders. Some people change their genders because they have gender identity disorder - women who want to be men and vice versa. To quote what someone said on the show:

Gender is what you were born with.
Sexuality is what you do with it.

10% of all babies are gender-ambiguous at the time of Birth; babies with genital or genetic variations are called "intersex" and 1 in every 1000 babies is born as "intersex".

Ok, I'll continue this another day.

Google Chrome

2010-11-21T16:34:00.002+08:00

I am trying out Google Chrome for the 1st time in my life. I don't feel the difference in IE: is it supposed to be faster? It still feels the same: but I prefer the look of it to IE, I don't know why.

Oh, I've finished reading Room :D

Short Post today.

Room

2010-11-20T21:10:00.003+08:00

I abought a book today. Emma Donoghue's Room. From MPH at Novena - cost me $28.89. And My father gave me $100 for the entire holiday. Hope I don't have to pay for my textbooks for Year 3; I think I might have to pay for my shoes (my father always insists I need to buy new shoes, because having "sloppy shoes" is tantamount to telling people he is abusing me by not buying me things)

To five-year old Jack, Room is the world. It's where was born, it's where he and his Ma eat and sleep and play and learn. At night, his Ma shuts him safely in the wardrobe, where he is meant to asleep when Old Nick visits.

Room is home to Jack, but to Ma it's the prison where she has been held for 7 years. Through her fierce love for her son, she has created a life for him in this eleven-by-eleven-foot space. But with Jack's curiosity building alongside her own desperation, she knows that Room cannot contain either much longer.

It sounds fantastic (It's written in Jack's POV) It's one of the few books that caught my attention - I saw the review in Life! before I decided to read it. It sounds like the Fritzl case, remember, when this woman was imprisoned by her father for 24 years and had 7(?) children by him. Of course, this was all mentioned in the newspaper, but there are pretty obvious differences anyway.

Actually, I was undecided between Alice Sebold's The Almost Moon and Room. In Almost Moon, this lady (40+ year-old Helen Knightly) murders her 89-year old mother by smothering her mother's face in towels (her mother is suffering from Dementia and frequently shits herself and calls random women "Bitch"). Plus, Alice Sebold's writing sounds...close to me. But then again, I like the cover of Room more.

Yes, let it be known that book covers affect my choice of literature :D

Growing Up Beside You

2010-11-19T17:21:00.004+08:00

Today was a good day. I feel good.

But not so much in the morning, where we got scolded by Mr. Lim for making a lot of noise during assembly. He also scolded us about "some students" who were causing a ruckus on 198 a few days ago - so loud, in fact, that a member of the public complained about us. I feel a little bit bad because 04 was also dragged into it, because around 90% of the noise was coming from our class. Mr. Low also showed us the complaint letter in class: the guy's english is pretty bad :/

Then we cleaned the classroom.

I didnt do much because I felt sort-of-lazy. DAMN DIRTY THE PIGEON CAGE IS. Water and Ethanol doesn't get rid of it - we brought it down the Bio lab for cleaning: never saw it again. I helped remove all the decorations near our clock (the one we used to turn the class into the "gothic place" Ms. Cheng wanted for English class) And someone took the dustbin dunno where?

Progress report time.

I did well! Got higher than I expected :D I can't believe I got A+ for Maths and A for Chemistry and Physics. I put in some effort during this semester, ok (except during the exam). The only thing I am slightly pissed is the "merit" I got for Design and Engineering. I guess its because of my lame photo frame. My sketchbook seems fine, according to what Ms.K says: my yo-yo design is also "creative" (but I bet it says that for everybody).

Then I watched I-Robot and Monsters vs. Aliens in 204

Played Hearts too. Sabrina and Shiyang are Very Pro *sigh* Near the end of the movie, Matthew went to the class and messed around with Xinyi's spraypaint so all our Geography models are destroyed. Well, I don't really mind: it looked better anyway (Shi Yi's/Yantong's at least). Oh, and I hope Yantong liked her (cheapskate) birthday present :D

After that, Me and Matthew went to Subway (after spraying blue spraypaint on the grass) where this random girl scolded us for "cutting the cue"(we asked the girls who were standing in front of the drink dispenser whether they were in the queue and they said "yes"; then after we "cut the cue" they walked off)and started saying charming things to Matthew like "Cut cue, all you know is cut cue" and "stare lah, keep staring". But she only said it to Matt, not me 0.0

Then we went to Plaza Singapura.

We saw the Kinect thing for Xbox. It somehow reminds me of the Wii - except "your body" is the controller: you have to raise your hands and jump etc. (with no controller). Matt's getting it because he got higher than 3.6 for his GPA (he got 3.9 or 4.0 I think - I feel its because of Normal Mother Tongue though ;): I hope he doesn't wreck it. Oh, but the sensor area is quite small - I think it's smaller than the Wii :/

Ok, good day :D

Happy Deepavali and Happy Hari Raya Haji (I frgt to say so yesterday)

The Incredible Machine

2010-11-18T18:38:00.007+08:00

^My new favourite song :D
It cheered up a sort-of-bad day. I mean, tomorrow is the day I'll(we'll) be wearing my uniform this year (i.e. last day of the class together). Plus I(we) will be receiving our RESULTS SLIP. Call me conceited but I want to get at least 4.6 for my CAP. In defence, Shi Yi's desire is to remain on principal's list (which means a 5.0)

Speaking of that song, I like the music video more than the song :D (the guy says what the f*ck around 1:31/1:32). Jennifer Nettles make a very convincing stalker, in a good way.

But the entire bridge is so reggae-ish, it becomes the best part of the song. And some parts of the song are auto-tuned. Of course, everybody wants to wage war over the Auto-tune; because it creates "a pervasive negative effect on society's perception and consumption of music" - wikipedia. Anyway, I think auto-tune...used creatively ...shouldn't be a problem. But you shouldn't use it as an attempt to pitch-correct your entire track. Usage in concerts is for a reliable backup too (but lots of country singers are not very supportive of it so I don't know :/)

High Hopes

2010-11-17T21:10:00.004+08:00

Holy holy cow Farady Won the House Championship! I feel so happy :D
Even though I contributed only 10 moonrocks :/ its okay though, I feel that I did my part. Most of the time I was watching tagball in the hall. Jeremey (Gui) is really good - but they kept changing ball posession because of this fantastic rule set halfway through the competition (once you drop the ball, the other team gets posession of the ball) which caused a rematch between Faraday and Fleming (and we won! Because originally we lost :D). Nobel got 1st the tagball - humph. At least Fibo got 3rd :)

I don't know why I was so against Fibo this time for House Carnival 0.0

Maybe it was because they got first for Sports Day. Ah, anyway, it's not like I'm enthusiastic enough to wage war on Fibos. Irritating red-heads (they're good too, but Faraday screwed them in B div AND C div tagball. We rock in sports, record-setting AND general awesomeness) The Year Ones are...very very unlike us in terms of enthu-ness. I will be more enthu next year, I promise.
a

School houses remind me of Hogwarts (Ive been reading HP every day now - I want to finish Deathly Hallows by Sunday because I'll be watching it with my family on that day :).

Nobel - Slytherin

Fibonacci - Gryffindor

Fleming - Ravenclaw

Faraday - Hufflepuff

Slytherins are supposed to be the "evil" people, but I think that's kind of stupid anyway. Shi Yi isnt evil, she's just undescribable. They are "smart and resourceful": guess that's why all the nobel ppl ponned me in Hearts. And Slytherins are enemies with Gryffindor, so Fibo should be enemies with Nobel. Let the Red and Green fight it out - Faraday will just take everything. Though I personally think Lions (the Gryffindor) would own the Snakes (the Slytherins) anytime. But come on, Hufflepuffs are hardworking?

Maybe the resemblance to Hogwarts houses are only in colour -.- Congratulations to Nobel, Fibo and Fleming anyway. Maybe you'll beat us next year.

We had an awesome day. I was playing Hearts most of the 2nd half. Meh. I realize playing with Ben and Gabriel rocks (because they play...less strategically than me. Its not that they aren't good :) But Shi Yi is too pro. Will find some way to beat her after I finish my birthday present for Yantong. But Fangyi, Jingwei, Yaaz and Jia Ying are so unsupportive :/ (Maybe they were in spirit, but most of the time they were just looking at the people playing. Jing Wei and Jia Ying were playing Tap Tap on somebody's iPhone >.>) And Yaaz wanted to go home (me too, actually, but I changed my mind and decided to come back and win 10 points for FARADAY :D)

Who Will Save My Soul.

2010-11-16T20:33:00.001+08:00

Not Me.